Saturday, January 15, 2005
when we are being trained to be hell's servents we are to be mindless thinkers. trained to do what we are told without question. like wild horses being trianed we must be broken.
As We all know some spirits are harder to break than others.
there for more harsher methods are used to control and mold the spirit. seperating me from my friends and family is a way for my spirit to be broken. My roots and backgrond have a strong tie to family and harmony in life. for me life without close friends by me is no life at all.
slowly, I drift closer to being away.
I will miss all that I have built up with my peoples. but hey every begining is the end of another.
you just have to learn to ajust to the changes.
to think out side the box is death, therefore you have to remake your box into something else.but not too much or you will lose yourself in the renovation.
Posted at 1/15/2005 11:42:24 pm by deepseapirate
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Sunday, January 09, 2005
people of the present and future
In hell there are bands of people who become brothers and sisters. they are there to help each others through. they are there to help boost confidence in others and in themselves.
In this way we learn to live and push on, through the hardship and into tomorrow.
It will be tough to pick up and pack to a new hell. there will be no one among the new warriors for me. I was initally trained to travel and to fight under water. now I will learn to fight above and not directly.
I am not a people person and I will not really show myself to others in the new war.
My new family is here and I am being torn away again.
For teh sake of the greater good I will go and start from nothing. I will be the best in the next new hell planned for me.
Posted at 1/9/2005 1:24:09 pm by deepseapirate
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Friday, January 07, 2005
The days of hell are infinite. hell is in no one place
heven and hell are everywhere and nowhere at once.
in the days of training for hells angels, the new arivals are kept confussed and unsure of themselves to strip them of the little amount of self reliance that is left after initial training.
I am no different.
I am now being sent to a new hell in a new part of this place. I am going to hell in paradise. Pensicola Florida.
Posted at 1/7/2005 3:41:22 pm by deepseapirate
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Thursday, December 23, 2004
the day that the world was created was not all to long ago it was the day that you were created and the day that you emerged in to this world.
people may not notice but they are gods in a way. they create, protect and destroy life on this planet. Everyliving being is a god. there are two types that are the most dangerous. Man and Woman. they both have the power to destroy and protect life. but women have the power to creat life.
the gods of the world I serve are not the same as the great creator that is immortal. the I am the god that protect the mortal creators. Iam the protector of the women that created me. Iam the protector of all the people who have shown me kindness. the people that are family. I have am here to protect them from far greater gods in other parts of the world. the gods that threatn in this world are small compared to those I am faceing now.
Now I trust the safty of my family to the gods of protection here.
I appriciate your help. Now I can take on bigger gods instead of dealing with smaller unimportant one.
TO all that read this. I will protect you and You will protect me.
Posted at 12/23/2004 7:11:40 pm by deepseapirate
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Monday, December 20, 2004
the days drag on and on in the frozen hell of home.
despite what people think hell actually does freeze over.
I know this because, behold I am in hell. the great ruller of this tiny hole of nothing tries to make it a better place for his workers but it is of no use. nothing could be done to ease the pain of leaving family and loved ones behind in the true paridise of peacefull lands.
the great ruller that is here is nothing more than a power hungry old man who will do anything to keep his power. depending on the day he will use different methods to hold hiss position. some days he will be a real leader, on others he will use fear, on most he will try to be the one we want.
in recent days he has tried to be a friend. he has given us freetime but instead of making me happy he has caused me more pain by taking from me the work that distracts my mind that longs to be with those I love.
Here I stay until the end of my sanity.
Posted at 12/20/2004 11:32:35 am by deepseapirate
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Saturday, November 27, 2004
the day is great but the night is better. the day hides things that can only be seen at night. But the night is better at hiding things from the day. a person can be remade in the dark of night and in the light of day.
the sweet guy next door during the day can change into the thing that hunts in the night. the coward down the street can turn into the hero of the night. in the cold reaches of the night, one can change into something tottaly different and the night will never tell on you ever.
when you look at a person never think of them as a safe person during the night or the day. always use caution when meeting some one new.
IF you meet a person don't think that you know them all to well. you maybe friends in the day and darkest foes at night.
every person has two sides to them.
think of me as special and cursed. happy and distant. Quiet and active. day and night will show two different sides of me
but do you want to meet both?
Posted at 11/27/2004 2:55:57 pm by deepseapirate
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Monday, November 22, 2004
the day the sky turned blue
No one ever notices the sky anymore. the sky and the world that people live in are a big part of life and teh simple existance that most people live in. the day that I finally really looked at the sky was the day that I left home for the first time. It was the most wonderful feeling in the world. to be free and not worry about what awaited you when you retured late or not returing was great. I spent the day driving around and playing games with anyone that would play. the day was cloudy and rainy I appriciated the feeling taht I had the world all to myself. no on ecould tell me to go or to stay no on e could tell me to get off the wet grass and dry off. I layed there for hours feeling the rain bounce off my skin. then I felt the rain briefly turn to hail but I did not run but relaxed further. with the relaxing feeling in my soul and self I felt the hail turn to snow.
the gental coldness that carresed my body and it landed and melted was exilerating and conforting. I lay there wondering what life would be like tomorrow and the day after.
It scared me and I lay there thinking. the thought suddenly hit me. don't think just go with it. with that thought the clouds showed small slow moving pathes of blue. the clouds and storm were passing and the blueness of the coming sky hit me and I was thoughtless and speach less. the sky was never so clear to me ever and has never been since. when you go with the flow every thing seems so clear.
People need to learn tnot to worry and to relax and go with the flow.
all will go well.
Posted at 11/22/2004 5:13:33 pm by deepseapirate
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Sunday, November 21, 2004
the world that I am stuck in at the current page in my life is demanding. I have been up for the past 48 hours. I am sleepy and cranky and very aggressive because of it.
I feel really nice about being here for because I just saw a poster that there are people out there that actually know we exist.
these few people are bringing those of us who are here during the commercial holidays into their homes to be apart of their families. they are bringing joy in the form of one santa clause. to bring back a time of joy that we enjoyed while we were free.
to them I am grateful. they are the few that give us hope and courage that we need to carry on. not so much them but the kids. I see a happy family and kids enjoying themselves. I know that this happiness can not last forever but the time they have a smile on thier face and what is called love, by many, in their hearts is well worth the sacrifice of my life and dreams. I am happy that sacrificing my dreams will give dreams to others. dream are what is needed to keep the world turing and revolving around the sun and dreams are what is needed to open our eyes to what we are and what we can do. to these young dreamers I tip my hat. I know I will keep the fight going so they can dream and i hope that they dream great dreams and are encouraged to dream. Dreams can go a long way.
remember to dream and when you dream to share them with other people.
Posted at 11/21/2004 4:52:41 pm by deepseapirate
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Saturday, November 20, 2004
the day the world grew II
Today I have been awake since 0400. working to make my day here ready for my battle. Not many people know it but there is always a battle going in the world whether in Iraq, in the streets or under the sea. there is always a battle within everyone, to be what they want to be. Sadly not everyone is winning.
not many people are who they want. they lose thier battle because they care so much about what other people are going think of them.
now I am here in another place working to make it a better more secure place to keep the secrets for and from those we protect. we are the keepers of world wide peace. we are here to fight for freedom and hope but we ourselves are deprived of freedom itself. we are who they tell us to be.
I will continue this throughout the night. for now I am resting and re-energizing. I will work through the nite and through the week. to keep peace. to keep hope for those we protect. hope that says you and your children are safe. your children will have a chance to be who they want. your children will grow and prosper and everyone will be happy. you are in the land of opertunity. you are free to enjoy all we have to offer.
no one realizes that there is a price for that hope. it is my hope and my life that I have given over to give you hope. my life has been put on hold.
no one says thank you. I am always looked a differently and everyone judges me. it is hard but I do it anyway.
I could cry and run away but I choose to be here. I choose to play the puppet to others who will bess use me to keep hope and freedom alive.
Posted at 11/20/2004 2:05:58 pm by deepseapirate
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Friday, November 19, 2004
the day that I found out that I could go home was the day that my world grew past the fence that now surrounds my place of residence. the fence that was built around this place to me has two purposes. one to keep me in and "safe" two to keep poeple out. I found out that I will be released from my prison, my cage. I will be given the small chance to see my home and family.
for the past six months I have been through hell and briefly in heven. to obtain a feel of self confidence. I have not yet obtainded I am still the same person I was when I first cam in this world.
I am still head strong and beleive in myself the same way.
I was in hell for nine long weeks. there I was stripped of everything that I possesed in the world and of me. or what was me on the outside. I was stripped of my name, my hair, and all I had with me.
I was stripped naked and given a new me. the people I was with were no longer strangers but were made to be me and me them.
I endoured torture and humiliation for nine weeks.
I was then omitted into hevan for two days and then sent to a new hell i am now here in Groton, Ct.
I was to be me no more.here I am being trained to be the best and the unheard of. I am still me.
they will never take me.
so many times, so much fighting to remain, I thought that they had won but now I have a new hope and a new way to fight. I have something to look forward to. I am going home.
Posted at 11/19/2004 4:44:22 pm by deepseapirate
